To Build A Shed

When I casually let slip to my wife that I was thinking of purchasing a new shed she, somewhat mockingly quipped, “Buying a shed, what on earth for? It surely can’t be beyond you to build a simple shed for yourself can it?�.
This was, to say the least, a bit of a set-back for me. Before broaching the subject with my better half I had already done my research. In fact I had gone as far as to select the shed I wanted, find the best price and contact the manufacturers for availability. It was a very nice shed indeed, with two little look-out windows in the doors, from where I could get early warning of Mrs Foster’s approach from the house. This would be very important on Sunday mornings, when I had every intention of passing a few tranquil moments over a nice cup of coffee and a read of the newspaper in my new shed, whilst my dear wife enjoyed herself weeding the garden, trimming hedges and doing endless other gardening chores, with which, if she could find me, I would be obliged to help her.

You see, my new shed was not going to be just a shed. It was going to be my shed, my private place, my castle. I had already organized the layout in my head. The right half was to be the storage shed area. That is where I would put the lawnmower, gardening equipment and garden furniture. On the left would be my workbench, with a comfortable chair, coffee-making facilities and FM radio. It was here that I would spend much of my leisure time, listening to the radio, reading the newspaper, reflecting on the important issues of the day. But now, all this had gone out of the window (the attractive skylight window in the shed roof probably). Because, now that my dear wife had become involved in the scheme, the whole concept of what my shed would be for, evolved. Although I am certain that no man alive considers his wife with more affection than I have in my heart for Mrs Foster, I must confess that she does have a few character traits that, to be perfectly honest, drive me berserk. One of these is her way of taking over any decision-making we do. By a subtle blend of charm, praise and totally ignoring any opposition, she always, but really, always, seems to get her own way. And now that the shed was to be our shed and not my shed, I knew, in my heart of hearts, that it would end up being her shed.

Nonetheless, being the loyal loving husband that I am, I entered our new joint-venture with gusto and in no time at all we (she) had scoured the internet and come up with a plan and instructions, from a very nice chap called Ted. Our shed was to be palatial. It would have a terrace and functioning windows on three sides under each of which would be a flower pot. I have holidayed in worse places. I did not expect to be able to construct such a beautiful building if I lived for a hundred years.

However, and here’s the exciting part, I did it! Thanks to obtaining excellent plans and following the very sound advice and instructions from that nice chap Ted, I actually built, not just an ordinary shed, but a shed that even Mrs F. finds acceptable. So much so in fact, that, of a weekend, she practically takes up residence in there, busying herself with her potted plants and handicraft projects, leaving me plenty of free time to get on with weeding the garden and trimming the hedges!